Mayday

When I said you weren’t that handsome
you turned away, almost cried
but my darling, what I meant
was yours is beauty, deep inside

When you overhead me saying
I couldn’t be seeing my days with you
it’s only because I’ve always thought
you’re too good, too honest, too true

And I know the way it looked, with Liam
upstairs, the other night
but my love, he hadn’t a stitch to wear
after a barney with his wife

Know it don’t explain, fully
my lack of clothes, and state of dress
but I’d only just come out the bath
when he knocked the door all stressed

And throwing him out the window
was maybe, baby, a step too far
you’ll be grateful he’ll recover
but sadly, on landing, trashed his car

Thank goodness, pressing charges
is the last thing on his mind
but his car will cost a pretty penny,
perhaps, could you phone ahead next time?

You’re the one and only, the man for me
and when I said I loved you, that’s not wrong
so please, my sweet, unlock the door
Been inside this fridge too friggin’ long….